Mithyaa..

Being Stag..to Being Swan.!!

2011-08-06T16:46:00.000+05:30

Yes.. I know, I truly know and well aware of the fact that its since soo long that have written something on my blog. *Transformation*.. I always knew there is nothing in this world that is wonderful than love but was never so much optimistic to find the one.!, infact I was never sure that I will ever get into marriage n all so early and also it was a blurred possibility for a circuit like me that any girl would like me to such an extent.

Anyways, she walked in and turned all my myths about myself upside down. I still remember my pulse rate ..whooaa!! Guess what, what was the first thing belled in my mind, I'm no more stag, free couple entry to any disc, cover charges ko middle finger n all the obvious bachelor hood thoughts which mainly focuses on reducing the cost of partying.. so silly of the moment.

Thanks to those 9 mins.! Yes, its almost between those 8 to 9 mins that we decided to get married. At this moment we both do not even believe that we are engaged and that too its arranged. It has its magic, I can feel it.

Boss, I'm 28 years old and 29 is running and in this long journey of hardships :P I have never wrote, spoke or thought the words "I love you"..! uffffffffffff... I feel so soo good when I say those words to Aboli.

Its a Swan feeling...

I want her to read this post.. Its especially dedicated to my Mon Amour.~ She keeps honoring my FB wall by putting her lovable words and manages keep a sweet complaint that I never respond to her messages with I love you, publicly. I know and as you know I'm not at all good at writing love letter and all but ya this is also true that I have never given it a try for you re. !! <3

I am so sad and depressed..

is all I want to do is rest.!!

I go to sleep at night

but my dreams I just can't fight..!!!

I think of you lying in that bed..

& wonder if there is anything I could have said

I wish you were still here

& I knew that you are still near

I love you more than I know ..

I just wish you didn't have to go..!

I just want one more day with you..

& I know thats what you would have wanted too..

I miss you more & more each day..

There is so much more we had to say...!

I know I will see you again..

But my life is just started to begin.!!!

Don't know where it come from..!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love you. <3

The day I was Born..!!

2011-03-06T18:33:00.001+05:30

Well.. since the time I read Tanvi birthday post, I was planning to post something like her.. But I don't think it will finish in 29 points.! Actually it was on 4th March but I was too engrossed with my best friend, Kaustubh who had came all the travelling 300km to Pune to celebrate my big day.. It was a big content when you are with your best people around you.

So, coming to point. Here's who I am.

- I truly believe that I am a surviver, since the day I was born.
- When I was 15 days old I survived a major leg surgery. As per the index the survival chance of babies undergoing this surgery was 0.5% 27 years ago. And I was in that 0.5%.

- So, now I use footwear 10No. for left leg and 11 No. for the right one. Unique ahhh..!! It used to be my complex, but later I turned it into my uniqueness when I started treking at the age of 20.

- Doctor had adviced to avoid that but "never say die" is me. Now I'm rock climbling trainer from JN institue of moutaineering. Kool ahh.. conquer your fears n all the theory.

- Till now I have travelled across all the jungles in India.

- I was using my bicycle till the age of 25., I feel surprised now.

- Steve Waugh used to be my biggest inspiration in my teens and I statred believing in the Law of Attraction, The Secret when I met him and worked with him for a week. I went crazy for two months, after effects. refer my one of previous posts on Steve. He do regularly reply my mails. *Satisfaction..*

- I didn't recognise Jimmy Carter, Ex-President of the USA when he was beside me on Jimmy Carter Work Project in June 2007 at Lonavala. Later laughed and striked a conversation.

- I did almost all kinds of jobs, from sweeping in chai tapri to heading an HR dept. of an MNC. Sweeping, not because I of economic problem. But I wanted to experience the problems those boys face, *early age crazy thoughts..*

- I worked for a week as a load carrier for Rs30/- a day in Bara Bazar Kolkata in one grain godown for the one I love and suffered bloody scars for 6 months. *Power of love haha..*

- I believe in "work hard..party harder.."

- I rarely lose my friends; I have retained almost most of my friends. Kedar is my oldest friend and we are together since the age 4.

- I can get along with almost any person on the earth. I rarely hate anyone, but when I hate its too genuine.

- I love India too much and once Im finished with India exploring I am all set to explore the world.

- Dip / Bebo / Swati / Splurja are my best buddies and I want to invite them on my wedding. *Hope never dies.*

- I found Tbg is like me..*crazy*

- My mom is too cute and Love her like anything.

- My younger bro doesn't booze without me and he looks my elder. He's 6.5. *winks*

- Movies, Im a total movie freak. Dip n mine movie likes are almost similar.

- Believes in doing crazy stuff.

- Dance.. Loves to dance like crazy. Once I danced for 8 hrs..and got 5 flame shot, complementary. *stamina huuhh..*

- Girls, all are friends. Never thought bad.! Scared of marriage. *blues..*

Finally... The party pic.. with bro.

It was crazy.. Two nights had full fun. Ya, Missed my best friend Avi.. She flied to Singapore.

Till now the life is so much contended. No regrets.

Love.

Shan.

Departed..

2011-01-31T21:54:00.000+05:30

It should be "was departed.." Im not someone who easily falls in friendship, forget love n all. Im a friend with each and everyone, but my friends are very very few. And all of them who are my friends have gone through so many tough times with me and are still there for me with my swings, spins, abuses and what not.. My darlings.. !!!!

Yesterday I came back from my one of memorable tours.. started from Jabalpur - Jaipur - Dilli - Mathura - Agra - Fatehpur Sikri - Jabalpur. Now Im shifted to Bangalore so I need to rush for bangalore so on the same day when I landed JBP, I started for Nagpur - Pune - Bangalore. Now Im in Pune.

In morning my Mum called to tell me that my oldest friend Yogesh is getting married and was trying my old number. I was like "what the fuck... yogya is also getting married... now Im the last one in my group who is left.. F** man.!!" Khushi bhi tha n I don't know what the hell was that feeling..

The only thing I realized was how the heel forgot to give him my number.. not one month two months.. its damn 2 years, Im good for nothing..!! so many thoughts were going on in my mind. Im always good with remembering my beloveds phone numbers, birth dates n minor details. I knew I remember his number but was not sure that still its the same. But, anyways, thought to take a chance.

Dialled.. Not reachable.. again dialled.. he picked up.!

Me - Yogya..

Yogya - who

Me - "totaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalllllllllllllllllllllll...total timepass.." (this used to be our favorite song when we were hostelites.. Its Rani Mukherjee n Govinda's flick Hadh Kardi aapne...usme wo gaana hai "aa pyaar karen bindasss..wala") so we used to address ek dusreko TOTAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLL...

Yogya - Saaalaa , kuttaa... blahblaha... (to much abuse..Loved it)

Time for meeting fixed.. I never knew how it feels to meet a friend after 2 long years. Now I know, its a joy and terrific love. Want to thank God for meeting me with such a wonderful angels..

Hardly gets emotional n all.. I have to get drunk today, Im missing her badly. !

N look Bebo awarded me.. Thank you so much bebo, it may be virtual but I truly believe the prayers always plays its role even we do not meet or know each other.. You the best friend I can ever have.

Love

Shan..

Journeys and Serects.

2011-01-19T11:43:00.001+05:30

This is my secret image, cannot upload on FB that is why sharing with you all here. Wo FB pe doorki behen n other rishtedaar hain, so you know.. Little family pange n all.

Its my favorite pic, took this snap when I was in Agra. When you come out of Taj Mahal, there is Taj Restaurant n Beer bar by Taj Group, only beer served. And its since long time, almost 9 months and some days that I didn't have beer. I was already high when I saw that ecstatic creation, Taj.

Wow.. what a time it was. I was all alone..I actually like traveling alone like this, no restrictions, no hurry, you are always in peace n happiness, you can enjoy each n every moment and can store it in your heart for the lifetime. I was already on "Cloud 9" before coming to Agra, I reached Agra via Jhansi..

In Jhansi, I met my cousin Uncle, his Sons, his grandsons, my lovely n soooo sweet bhabhis and what not, that too after 25 years. That time I came to know my family tree is so huge and also that Im an Uncle of my nephews. They are too adorable, uploaded their pics on FB. The weather was too good when got down at Jhansi Station at 4am, it was 1 degree temperature and 10% visibility. i always get a high with such atmospheres. I was treated like a prince at home, after all 25 years was no small deal.

It was just a geographical distance that kept us apart, but now "Ata me ahe naa dada (ab main hun na dada).." as I told to my Uncle, n he was smiling through his artificial teeth, glossy n shiny wrinkles n through white eyebrows.. I felt him so contended when he was talking about his journey from the small village to the pioneering place in Govt. of India.

When I was a kid I saw him staying in 8 by 10 room with his wife.. n now he owns a bungalow of the rooms, I dont remember number of rooms, the last time I remember I counted was 17. He has 3 sons all stay together with their wives, kids n one sweet tenant. Touchwood, such a great thing to see joint family, that too my family.

Anyways, Jhansi was all fun, then I started towards Agra in the early morning to meet my other cousin brother, thi Uncles' 3rd Son. When started with the train I found it so amazing that train goes through UP, MP, Rajasthan and then again UP.. "fun n happiness" All along the way I was enjoying "Sarson ke khet" all the yellow mellow flowers were spread till the end you can see through your eyes. "adrenaline up."

In Cyclce rikshaw.. streets of Agra.

Ok, I was so much drifted away from the main topic, MY SECRET pic, 1st one. So, after enjoying all the glory and glam of The Taj, I was little famished and felt to have some snacks or fruit juice and so I spotted this Taj resto Bar. As soon as I entered, there was something in that air that lifted me from inside, I truly don't know what that was, but for sure I'm going to visit that place once again before winters ends.

I made myself relaxed in the last corner chair, secluded n isolated from the rest n from where I could view the Taj rush and smoky fog also. Menu card was handed over to me by one typical "agraa waiter", who became my good friend in that 1.25hrs.

Im very bad at giving orders, actually I get scared of menu cards and thats why I generally prefer street food, but that day was trap. I kept down that menu card, called that waiter and asked him --

"tum batao, kya achha milega ??"

Waiter - Sir, aap ki taste pe depend karta hai.? veg non veg.?

Me - yaar, heavy khane ka mood nahi hai.

W - Biryani lelo?

Me - "winks / smiles / blushes" - good idea. kaun bayega? kaisi banayega?

W - Sir, aap bas khao, baki main hun.

Me- daru bhi hai idhar?

W - Beer hai sir, sirf Kingfisher?

Me- ummm..

W - aap akele hain sir, toh masti ,main lijiye. agraa khush ho jayega.

Me - marketing kar raha hai kya?

W- sir muze toh utna peesa (salary) milna hai, aap dekhlo.

Me (along with rongate (excitement)) - le aa.. chakna / snacks?

W- kuch nahi hai sir.. sirf paapad. !! naam ka bar hai sir.

Me - No issues. ek paapad.

I cannot explain that heavenly feeling. Not that I was high n all..but yeahh... that Suroor was terrific. ! I took Ayn Rand, I recently bought this in Bhopal, its a fabulous book as usual, Ayn Rand, went n reading, was feeling there is no need to die to go to heaven, its here only. Was little senti, but its ok, khudke liye senti hona I would love to.

N ya beer tastes too good when you sip it after a long time. N those are my fav gadgets,, jyada hi fi nahi hai, its ok.. I love them. That is IDEE ke shades, biught from Kalkata.. Love them too much..

Rest is fine. I miss you all too too much. I can't write very often when I want to, currently I have no home to stay in jabalpur, searching some good cozy place.. Will move from jabalpur very soon, next may be any good metro, depends on company. But do keep in mind I always read your posts and I feel very much connected.

Love.

Shan.

Its time to breath after a long time.

2010-11-24T14:18:00.000+05:30

Well.. sometimes its a good feeling to be a vella.! haha..I love it to stay in bed for a long, to break my disciplined schedule, to not to wear formals all the time (man I hate to wear neck tie, although I look good with it). N believe me its a terrific cold here in Madhya Pradesh. I have experienced almost all the cold weathers in all the states, this one is too much and I'm liking it.

Ok, there is one more reason I'm vella this week, Leg injured. Here in Jabalpur there is a holy river called Narmada aka Narmada ji, as they call it here. N there was a big mela last sunday here in Bhedaghat, remember Asoka's raat ka nasha song wala location. So, I along with some friend I made here had gone for a Snan in this river in the earliest morning at 6 am.

Believe me, already its cold and in addition to that all the floor of the earth is marble, so it was painfully cold. I was very hesitant doing this Snan thing in public. But to my surprise almost every single creature there at ghat, including all sized females, were doing this thing. So, finally I jumped off in the water and while I was enjoying the cold thing, my left leg slipped because of the water current and I felt down in water. blood n blood..!! '

There was no sensation of the injury till evening, later it started showing its magic. Nothing's serious, have applied bandages n all.

Till this time have roamed around 16000Km here in MP, did set up some good things for my company and for unprivileged, recruited more than 255 employees, visited 300 poor households and 28 districts. So all in all its a good sleep at night, peace.

Also, staying with some amazing people. Getting a smell of real India. I actually saw Peepli Live like people here and felt them. Came to conclusion. India is grat. Flying off to various Asian countries Next year but I know I'l still feel , India is Great.

Trying to upload some pics.

On the way to bhedaghat. with Soni family. One the best mates I have made here in JBP

Damn server is holdin me to upload some more pics.

Memoir in Mind.

2010-10-22T18:49:00.000+05:30

These days I m traveling like crazy from place to place. And its definitely on my mind to write a memoir, though I have started to shape it. Guys since last 7 days I have traveled almost 5000 kms, 3 states, and around 8 cities where I have never been to. People and people. Being an HR person for me its all about people.

Right now Im in Jabalpur and gona meet Dona Ganguly, Saurav Ganguly's wife at Bedaghat.

Do you remember Kareena's song in Asoka.. "Raat ka nasha abhi.." that place is bedaghat, there are literally hills of Marble and Narmada river flows like anything. Spellbound, tonight Im going there.

Till december I'll cover all the Indian cities, almost hann. From Jan, I'll be flying for Jakarta, Singapore, Brazil..n don't know where.! Pry for me.!

Love you all. Pics coming. More on FB.

Caution - Don't Rub your balls..!!

2010-10-22T18:40:00.000+05:30

Date - 13/10/2010

Day - I don't remember.

Place - My HO at bengaluru.

Time - 1000 hrs.

People - Shantanu, COO(Male), CEO(Male), MY VP- HR (female), Sr. Manager(Operations)

Scene - Everyone dressed up professionally, Neck tie n all (I don't like tie). Everyone gets up one after other and gives presentation.

- Pathetic presentations by VP, Irritated CEO.

- Sr. Manager gets yp for ppt.

- First bring bearable 5 mins.

- Suddenly he starts rubbing his balls. 1 st warning by COO.

- Me, LoL too much from inside, but couldn't from outside.. uffff suffocation.

- Again 5 min, irrestible itching in his balls. He starts rubbing.

- SUSPENDED FOR 2 MONTHS. : CEO Roars.

- Itch guard could have prevented this.

That is why don't rub your balls guys.

(Dipti + Sonal + Swati + Splurja +Pavitra + Nosto) = Shantanu

2010-09-29T20:07:00.001+05:30

I seriously cannot stay at a place where I do get some kind of a high or some kind of a "Nashaa". Well, I don't know why did I write this sentence?

Anyways, its since ages that I have been to my blog. Last some days are truly memorable for me and I know its not gonna end here as I am going to go places in coming months. Its a great deal of satisfaction and contentment I am experiencing that one craves for out of his job. Its a magical feeling when you see lives of grass root people are getting altered because of your one act, may its professional by your point of view, but its truly a big deal for you.

I have so many stories to tell, about people, about places, about food, about egos, attitudes n so much. Rarely do I get a good time to write all this stuff. Weekends I go for tracking or some kind of a site seeing when I am in a new a place. Since last month, I have explored some unknown places in and around bangalore, davangere, Mysore, tumkur, aurangabad, Delhi and so many small n remote places. And of course food without fail. I can't afford to miss regional food tastes. So you see its totally a packed week and I have told many of you, my dell baby do not allow me to open my blog.

But ya, I do keep in touch with all of those on FB. I bought one super k0ol nokia machine which takes some awesome photographs, "with sigh," abhi tak sirf mere cabin, chair n ek mera he photu liya maine...kitne saare fotos lene hai...!!!!!!!!!!!! I'll upload those on FB, almost all of you are there in my FB list, "blush rising"..

I truly miss you all veryyy muchhh..!! Dip, I was always in touch with your mood, these days I don't know what are you upto. I am starting reading your stuff right away. Today only, me ans Swati were discussing about you, soo see how much do we care and always wana be in touch with you.

Bebo..!! Sonal, now you have became an inevitable friend that I cannot afford to lose. I am truly thankful of this place aka venting machine for having met us, FB also. Its always fun and refreshing as I have already mentioned on FB, to share thoughts with you. The basic vital element that I like of this friendship is its no exaggeration and its just like that. No matter how less I'm on blog, I am so happy FB has given that place to catch up. Always be happy, all the good things, good people, best friends are there for you and you are a serious sweetheart..!

Swati mata, you rockkk..!! and yes you also a sweetheart and love you too.!! I know you hate flattering and can tear one up if you don't like, but I can do it well. zel lo..! I have already done you tarrif there at FB and I mean it girl. Find some time to write some posts I'l be obliged. all the best. and follow me na yaar, I want you here in my friend list.

Splurjo Splurjo Splurjo..... remember me kya?? kahan ho tum, infact you should ask this to me. but anyways, I miss you and your mature words too. I'll mail you tonight.

Nosto girl.. I have some god wishes for you. first of all a peace of mind, all the happiness in the world, and love love love..!! all that you deserve.

Pavitra.. Its as if I am doing a sin that I am not reading your posts. But I'll make sure to read out all those this weekend. You really write well, no doubts, its blessing to write poems

I shall write one interesting post of my interesting experience in bangalore.

for now guys aasata la vistaa..!

loads of love n luckss..

:))))

Loaded n Enjoying.

2010-08-30T09:42:00.000+05:30

I have tried to be as eclectic as possibly I can with my professional life and so far it's pretty fun.

- Ronald Barthes.

Its since so long that I have put my thoughts to share with you guys. Its a professional lock-out. But things looks okay when you like your work. Till now going cool. Recently got some more responsibilities on shoulders n good designation.

I shall be moving to Bangalore for more training on 1st Sept. So, its more constrained you know as I would be traveling across country and continents. So, lesser n lesser writing. But its okay until n unless I am enjoying my work.

Obviously, I'll be all in touch with all of you through reading your updates on blogs n FB. These things are truly divine and has made my life rocking. I so much love you all.

These days I am reading more of a business stuff. HR Scorecard, I love this person Dave Ulrich, very creative and a true writer. A good combo of business, ethics n a craziness. Also, Im drawing portraits on weekends, so all in all its a fun life.

Recently, one Auckland Journal on Arts has published my paper on poetry, great deal of satisfaction on face. "content and smiles". I wish to share with you guys but do not how to upload .pdf file.

Parents as usual worried about "pata nahi kab karega shadi" n my reply is always as "LoL"

Woke at 5.30 am today, too early. Had to drop my younger bro at the railway station. Its always fun with him. Rained badly yesterday night, so road were pretty clean. Stopped on the way back around the lake near my house to see sunrise, but "sigh" he refused to show up his face. all cloudy.

Sipped hot tea, in fact KeTea , its a combo of tea leaves, coffee with a ginger shot. Awesome, healthy. No acidity.

My request and prayers also. Please do not ever be sad, always keep a long honest grin. You are the best people I have with me and I just want to see smiles all the way.

Love you.

Heaven unplugged.!

2010-08-14T19:55:00.000+05:30

Monsoon always brings life with her. She nourish the tadpoles, blows oxygen into orchids, wraps the green shawls around the shoulders of mountains. I don't like to get wet too much but enjoy the changes she paints on the canvas of nature.

Lonavala and Khadala are one such places around here where Sun is on leave for four months of monsoon. Fog holds your breath while you ride or drive to the Tiger Hills. Usually, its 25 min of bike ride to tiger hills from lonavala, but we took 11/2 hrs. to reach. This is because each waterfall on the way has his own story to tell.

Spellbound. I was accompanied with some friends from Patna, Nagpur, Bhopal, Orissa. I don't find it much difficult to make friends from any planet.

Pics are of Lonavala, Amby valley, Tiger hills and Khandala.

Two Ass

Crab.

Zero Visibility at Tiger Hills

That's my bike there. Red one 04

The roads were too clean.

Tigerhills waterfalls.

Bhushi dam.

Cheenti Pahad chadhe..Marane ke waastey.!

2010-08-14T00:20:00.000+05:30

Today, I witnessed a suicide. It was in our colony. The sight was terrible. At around 4pm the family started shouting. We are not but almost live close by that house, so heard the screams. I rushed asap.

The door was closed from inside and from the window I could see the daughter-in-law of the family was hanging to ceiling fan. We, some five to six men, tried too hard to break the door. Finally Police arrived and one Daya style police wala broke the door.

When we entered inside, her FM radio was on and the song airing was

"Cheenti pahad chadhe Marane ke waasatey

Ladki kare fashion ladkon ke waasatey." irony..!!

I really prey one should not witness such scenes, especially ladies. This is because two of the females there puked on the spot as they saw the dead body. The tongue was out of the mouth, you wont believe the length of the tongue, it was double the normal. The legs, in fact the whole body, was stretched. I can't forget those eyes, only white part was visible. Don't know where the pupils were gone. Scaryy..

I couldn't stand those cries n all. I took my bike and went to mall, bought 3 Ts, one Osho slippers. Life is to love why the hell one need to end life this way. Attitude of gratitude , Im following it.!

the Daru post.! haPPens haPPened..

2010-08-11T01:42:00.000+05:30

this post is surely gona s*u*c*k... so those of you in a good mood, with their beloveds

spending good times, and don't want to see something stinking and abusive

post pleeeeease don't go furtherr coz everything is gonnaA be aBruPt fROm now..

OK..so you are sTILL witH meE..come .

wElL, right now soME 180ml 42%ethanol(rum), 750/2= 375ml 8% ethanol(beer),

anD soME tWo fU**ng tOOo goOd taquIlLLas are Playing kHo KhO in mA tummy..

(that is a disadvantage of tOO muCh studYing, u see everything at micro level..)

buT who Cares how much is IT..??

but I DIDN sMOke.. its more tHAn 35 days now.

wE, ,me n ma school friend, sat near railway track an hour ago, saw trains passing us, we sang some songs, had booze with chaknaa.

ate egg curry went on a walk through tunnel, we shouted, naa, screamed, abused MCBC in that tunnel..

we, in fact I, vented out some shit...

After so long I am in low. I am exactly feeling my serotonin levels are big time famished, my adrenaline has dried up and heart is taking efforts to pump, I am feeling heavy at this such a wonderful wt., I am unable to do even 20 push ups today.

I am not into writing such posts, but who cares, its ok, you are my people. you love me, abuse me but at least you are honest as I think coz I am too honest in this case.

Reasons : y all this going on.?? what are these shit symptoms.? now I am on leave for a week to treat my sinus, was terribly ill with fever till today. why the hell was i waiting for that one fuc**in call to ask me how am i? i never expected anything from anyone but love. so many stabs on my back, so many. there is no space left, but still they find some. I don't ,ind getting those, but i cant fake myself..

LOVE NET airing on channel V..!! such a loosers, they hide their identity over the net and indulge in love chat.. bullshitss..if one cannot maintain his dignity even for own id, then rest is shit..!

DIP.. i have puked enough on ROSHOGULLA (I LOVE THIS THING SO MUCH), and some FB posts, please bear with me.! i'll say sorry later.! i find little salvation, some momy lap kinda feeling at ur blog.. Viju..you are a sweetheart,, you listen me so patiently on chats but ya i must say u have a too much stamina to talk n talk n talk...in fact type, type n type, thnks for being ears..! actually i love everyone of you..

just want to HUg someone tight n cryy..since so long I havenot cried..!!

love.

talli me.!

shanU

(rechristened by sonal) love this name, reminds me something..

Killing our dreams.

2010-08-03T01:30:00.001+05:30

The following write up is not at all my production. These words are by Petrus. He has shared these thoughts with Paulo Cohelo during his book "The Pilgimage". Cohelo has shared this article on his blog. I like Cohelo's short stories, they have learning and common sense into it, not lengthy and some punch lines that straight goes into erythrocytes. And we can relate with them, as I was discussing with Bebo.

I could have shared the link with you, but I so much wanted to write it. So that it sinks in the system and get carved on subconscious as well. I am not agree with whole of the thoughts of Petrus but I liked the so much seasoned thought process.

Its not at all necessary to agree with everything that big shots writes unless it agrees with your own reason and common sense, as Buddha says.

Recently came across with one outstanding poet Spike Milligan. I have posted

it on my poems blog. He has some tragic ways to blush at words.

http://satyyaa-shantanu.blogspot.com/

Killing our dreams :

The First Symptom of the process of our killing our dreams is the lack of time. The busiest people I have known in my life always have time enough to do everything. Those who do nothing are always tired and pay no attention to the little amount of work they are required to do. They complain constantly that the day is too short. The truth is, they are afraid to fight the Good Fight.

The second symptom of the death of our dreams lies in our certainties. Because we don’t want to see life as a grand adventure, we begin to think of ourselves as wise and fair and correct in asking so little of life. We look beyond the walls of our day-to-day existence, and we hear the sound of lances breaking, we smell the dust and the sweat, and we see the great defeats and the fire in the eyes of the warriors. But we never see the delight, the immense delight in the hearts of those who are engaged in the battle. For them, neither victory nor defeat is important; what’s important is only that they are fighting the Good Fight.

And, finally, the third symptom of the passing of our dreams is peace. Life becomes a Sunday afternoon; we ask for nothing grand, and we cease to demand anything more than we are willing to give. In that state, we think of ourselves as being mature; we put aside the fantasies of our youth, and we seek personal and professional achievement. We are surprised when people our age say that they still want this or that out of life. But really, deep in our hearts, we know that what has happened is that we have renounced the battle for our dreams – we have refused to fight the Good Fight.

When we renounce our dreams and find peace, we go through a short period of tranquility. But the dead dreams begin to rot within us and to infect our entire being.

We become cruel to those around us, and then we begin to direct this cruelty against ourselves. That’s when illnesses and psychoses arise. What we sought to avoid in combat – disappointment and defeat – come upon us because of our cowardice.

And one day, the dead, spoiled dreams make it difficult to breathe, and we actually seek death. It’s death that frees us from our certainties, from our work, and from that terrible peace of our Sunday afternoons

Bournvita..

2010-07-28T19:15:00.002+05:30

Background ~> raining wholly and holy, cool winds, bent coconut tree in my garden, drooping flowers on tendrils.

Scene 1 starts. ~>

Drenched in mud, coconut in my right hand, grocery bag in the left one, one ball pen in the socket of skull and upper tympanum(ear), endless talk over the earphone, one ant crawling on my short, neighbor auntie asking, in fact shouting and scolding, the questions from behind the wall for my avatar.(feeling so much happy inside)

Scene 1 ends. ~>

This is how I was standing an hour ago in my gate asking my pitah (dad) to open it. Yesterday, Mom has gone to Mumbai for her table tennis matches, she plays on behalf of her office and believe me she plays so so well, and she has given all the responsibility of her baby to her husband and vice-versa. So, you can understand such a big duties..

Since yesterday I am a kitchen king..made kind of paranthas and daal fry. He liked it. Showed him two Telugu movies, Bomarillu and Arya 1, every soul in love should watch this movie Arya 1, on DVD. I was a translator of course. Dad was wondering how can he know Telugu.!! I read on his face. Well, I know Telugu, Marathi, Bengali, Gujrati as well.

Today's menu is Aloo Koftas, read the recipe on Anamika's blog. Papa is taking great care of me. He has asked me drink Bournvita 7 times since mom left the house.

Dad - Bournvita.??

Me - Piya.

Dad - when?

Me - In the morning.

Dad - It was for morning. what about now?

Me - No.. Dont like it now.

Dad - Why?

Me - Lets have beer.

Dad - Ok, bring one for me. You take Bournvita.

Me - hahaaaa...

Dad - Kid.

Me - I am not.

Dad - your mom told me.

Me - what?

Dad - to feed you Bournvita. ..

Maid dadi arrives drenched..I skipped. Today is 13th day I am asking her to say "itna paisa mein itna he milega" wo right hand palm up karke n all(remember Channel V wali Bai..) My Maid dadi is so much like her moti n cuty, she is with us since my birth. And she slaps on my back.

Maid dadi - kaun ladki terese shaadi karegi baba.?

Me -Muze bhi pata karna hai. (showing excitement in my "blushes")

M D - tu pehle bada toh ho ja..!!!

Dad(from hall) - Mausi usko Bournvita pilao, tab tak wo bada nahi hoga.

M D - aapne piya kya Bournvita.??

me - hahahaaaaaa...

I run away for Aloo Kofta grocery.!! SCENE 1 Starts..

love..

Shantanu :)

10 Things That Piss me Off..!!

2010-07-21T02:37:00.000+05:30

This one is a very long pending tag and was dieing to finish it. Somehow, I kept it on a back foot thinking I would complete it very dearly. I just read Splurgerina's tag and that motivated me, the right time to begin is now.

So, here I am with those "Pissing me" things and believe me these really Piss me off. I may sound disciplined or a military man while you read, but trust me I am a little.

So, lets hit..

ONE

* hate it.. when someone uses a tooth paste like this. Its not the way to use tooth paste, press it at the bottom naa..How much does it cost? And if its my tooth paste, you better be ready with some places to hide. It is such an unorganized way to start a day. I know we feel lazy, but no means no.

TWO

So what if its a footwear and it had to taste the dust of all places, it equally deserves good attention. It piss me off someone keeps their footwear like this, ulta-pulta or one footwear upside down. Dude, they take your care, try to listen to them. I have got full marks at Armed Forces Medical College for keeping the things as they should be, especially footwear. And I am also out of home for 8 years at hostels and at flats, so if I can then why can't we?

THREE

Its a global problem because we allow it to occur at home. And charity also starts at home. So whenever having food, if see someone wasting a food, it really piss me off. May sound absurd, so see this, in sub-Saharan Africa, at least 265 million people are hungry, heightening the travesty of the food waste problem. and read this as well http://www.grida.no/publications/rr/food-crisis/page/3558.aspx

FOUR

Spineless Men - These are always aired on TV soaps and are also present around. It piss me off when them losing their balls and masculinity for at least that is rational and gets backs, fronts and centers from their wives. Idiots.

THOSE WHO DON'T LIKE READING BOOKS, PLEASE DONT READ THIS POINT.

FIVE

I truly believe in reading everything that I can. There are so many thoughts and so many things to learn in this darm small life. This is such a powerful tool to get an insight in everything, especially poems. I hate and feel pity for the one who dont read. But its ok, sometimes someone cannot get along with it. But the thing that truly piss me off is when someone says "kaise padhte ho yaar?? reading is such a boring thing", Atleast dont make fun of it dude.

SIX

Know her..?? Piss me off, when I am with such kind of girls. I hate girls who plans, plots and created rifts between friends and family. I can smell them immediately and I have already kicked on their bumps.

SEVEN

Just because you reveal it does not mean I'll get hooked. There is difference between being slutty and being sexy, just as being Rakhi Sawant and being Katrina Kaif. Hate those chicks who thinks they can rule the worlds with their revealing curves. naah.! There are so many nice girls, why you.?

EIGHT

Needless to say, why it piss me off.!! Making out in public place is such an unholy thing. Go to your room naa. or rent a motel. But like this..ewww..~

NINE

I don't like it when someone barks his order at a waiter. or call him like " aee..shhuk shukkk.." especially those drunkards. Two pegs down and they feel they rule the world.

TEN

Ok, so now its almost done.. Finally.. Its yukk thing I hate.

99.9% of the times I avoid it, but there are certain high times in man's life that he has to face and can't escape.

It is one those times. It has so much pathetic odor of NH3, ammonia, that I hold my breath for those peeing seconds. And you ever visit this place, you will see so many kinds of a things, from erotic to literature on sex education, are written on those walls. Its really pisssssssssssssssiing one.

OK..so now I am tagging all those who have not done this post. yeyy.. m done.

Dip wala Gender Stereotype tag is still pending. I'l finish that one also asap. Guys, I hope you are having a rocking time.

Stay happy n smiling.

Shantanu. :)

Weird and Strange..

2010-07-17T01:02:00.001+05:30

I do not know what exactly that goes on in a girl's mind, never tried to know as well but honest. But recently I am getting such a weird experiences of them. I am getting so many friend requests from the girls who were my classmates, not long ago, just two years back.

Yes, you may wonder whats' that so strange. Well, it is.!! When I was all there, they never took any effort to acknowledge even my existence in the class. I do not know whether they were even having any good friend as they either used to be with their BFs, at parties or at hostel.

So, suddenly what happened.?? Almost all the girls who wants to be friends with me are married, at such a young age, eww.., obviously not with their BFs, whatever its their life. But the pathetic part is they are idle and keep hitting the PC buttons the whole day, and now they are interested to know what is my hometown.!!

haha.. so mean.!! There are so many grey shades, life is too short to witness them.

Anyways, people love u.

Shantanu. :)

Paul Octopus.. You are Late.!!

2010-07-13T19:51:00.001+05:30

This is created by one of friends on FB. I borrowed this pic to share with you.

I wish Paul was there at the time of exams. yeahh..!! Its late, but its ok.

Needless to say, this cephalopoda has surely gained enough attention to get protected from hunting.

Love, Shantanu. :)

OFF..!!

2010-07-08T19:12:00.000+05:30

I shall be off for 4 days trip for some professional stuff at Mumbai, Delhi, Ahmedabad. My first ever International conference. So excited.!!

Also, I shall meet up with my Uncle. He is gona get operated tomorrow. Spoke with Auntie. He is happy and is giving good vibes. Thanks to you guys.

Gona miss you a lot as wont be able to access my laptop because of security reasons.

* Abraham : My advance wishes on your 56th wedding anniversary. Please convey to Patty as well. I shall try to mail you on 12th July from outside of the venue.

* Dip : M gona miss FIFA finals. So, if Spain wins, I would say "Guru tu sahi bola tha" . N as I told you , miss me while beer. cheers.

* Splurjo / Swati : shall expect some more great stuff on ur posts when Im back.

* Vspirit : man ping me. where r u?

* Pavitra : M getting some more Edward Stewart stuff from Delhi. Stay well.

* Bebo : hope ur outing was good. And now you are all recheged.

* Sovina / Nikita : Thanks for the follow. You blog babies are awesome. Loved them.

* Ned and Spain : All the best. I know you both will miss me. Whoever wins the CUP I am going to Love FIFA till India wins the finals.

Shall be there by midnight.

ciao guys.

Love n hugs :)

Please Pray.

2010-07-07T02:30:00.001+05:30

Guys..

Need your help. My friend's father has suffered a cardiac arrest. He is gona get operated for Bi-Pass.

I consider both of them, Uncle and Auntie, not less than my own parents. I love them alot. I donot know God listens to me or not, so asking you.

Please pray for my friend as well. She is facing a very hard time right now, I know she wont let me know as I become tensed. She is all alone there along with her Mom. And God knows how she is handling all this. She is already very depressed because of her own issues.

Please wish her a good husband.

I cannot see this. I am feeling like shit. I am here 3500km away from her when I should be there with her. I cannot move for one week as doctor has suggested rest else sinus will burst. Its crap man.

Guys, please do me a favour. Please pray for them. I wont ask for anything.

Ganpati Bappa.. are you listening.? what are you doing with your mates??

cannot sleep tonight.

My Fag Tag : Splurgerina's Tag. :)

2010-07-05T23:17:00.002+05:30

Well, first things first. Thanks to Splurgerina for honoring me with "Sunshine Award" and tagging me to write about the 10 things that "Piss me Off". Later as I requested she suggested a headline "10 Things That Stress Me Out Enough to Smoke!" and its so cool, I thought n it is.

I still remember the day when I took my first Fag and my first booze 25th Oct.2005. Culprit my younger brother.!!

But to be very frank I am not at all a compulsive smoker. Yes I smoke but only on the following occasions. Its never with me like other guys who cant' even do potty without a cigarette. Stress, emotional trauma, heartbreak ewww..!!..nopez.!! these are really not always strong enough to induce nicotine need in me. And those who induce are not that weak as they look. Anyways, lets get started..

1. These Men :

Whenever I see this man smoking, holding the bud in the far deep between the two fingers, its so tempting.!! And he was in the same position when I saw him in "Fire n Ice". Such a kool man with compulsive smoking. And I am quite sure I am gona have one fag when I'll see "Once upon a time in Mumbai". Ajay in Haji Bhai's avtar.! Well, I am not at all his fan n all, but yes I appreciate the attitude he displays, especially his eys heart throb..!!

Yes, he is the one I love alot. Rajanikanth. Waiting so desperately for his next release, Endhiran. What a style he has got.!! Awesome, just awesome. I shall always have one only one fag after seeing him.

Yes, he is my he is heart throb also. No, I am not south Indian.

2. Places :

I truly believe places have their effect on me for smoking wholeheartedly. And at these places if you are not smoking then you are absolutely missing out on a lifetime fun. The ambiance demands it. The places which are close to my heart are :

- Tantra & Someplace Else @ Kolkata.

- Fire n Ice & Indya key @ Pune

- Apache @ Pune

- Everything on Bridgade Road, Bangalore.

- Liquids @ Banjara hills, Hyderabad.

- All the night outs in Mumbai & Delhi in open jeep and in Pune on bike, Magical.

but I do not remember ever exceeding the limit. It's always maximum 6 cigarettes with the gap of 40 min. That really gives you a high.

3. Exams and Hostel:

Believe me, in fact many of you must have experienced this, it is one the best times in your entire life when you are at hostel during your Grad or Post Grad days. No, hostel days of school can not really give that kind of a high. I know I am not telling you something out of the world thing. But you know hostel is such a pavlovian thing for smoking. In hostel nights are days and vice-versa. And when exams knocks, we used to feel so studious with cigarette in hand.

Do you remember that video song that they used to air on Doordarshan, " Cigarette in my hand, burns a man.." where the boy smokes n smokes and finally he become a skeleton.?? I still remember, in hostel, we saw that song, discussed on all the hazardous effects of smoking and sweared to quit smoking for the well being of our wives, progeny and the rest of family, of course not for ourselves, and got so tensed that at 2.30am we went to bus stand for Tea and Fag.!! The comment was," bhai.. ye last, kal se band.." and we are still waiting for that "Kal". So true.. tomorrow never dies.. ;-)

And of course, if we smoke during exam nights, its not our sin, refer whole student community in the word "Our". I remember when my wing partner cleaned his room after the exams, it was 5 cm thick layer of cigarette ash. And we celebrated that. Dirty naa...I know.!! That gave us a lesson of hygine.

So, now the status is, whenever we roommates meet, once in a blue moon as everyone is in the different parts of the planet, it calls for a fag. Memories.!!

4. Highways and travels:

Yes, this is the one thing that gives me kind of an orgasm. No drug, LSD, marijuana can ever be comparable with traveling on highway. May be on bike, in state transport bus, in car, in bulock cart, from village or taluka or metro. I just love every bit of traveling. And I feel so happy even when I am traveling alone. So ya that calls for a fag. I am still in that memory, when I and Upendra traveled all the western ghats, i.e. Konkan Maharashta, goa, coastal karnataka, to down Kerala, and have not smoked in whole journey just to have a fag at Dudhsagar. Its a wildest waterfall in monsoon at south goa where no

vehicle dares to reach. So, we walked around 20 km through Konkan railway tunnels, totally drenched in rains. When we reached the place, the water fall was like bournvita mixed milk one side and the other side was dragon valley.

Such triumphs truly desreves fag. Believe me its fun smoking when you win. Ya, the thing to mention is we detached 25 litches from my body which were sucking my blood while we walked through the tunnels.

5. On the ride with Ethanol:

Well, do I need to say anything regarding this.? Smoke tastes fabulous with some of the elite class scotches.

6. Smoking girls:

Frankly telling you, I scarcely like a girl or a woman smoking. No, no chauvinist issue. But I always feel that all the woman community should be in good health. Yes, I am a selective feminist. If you visit NCC canteen of Symbi in Pune or Xaviers' in Mumbai, n ya IIM C, Kolkata, I was feeling like, "Man, see here. Every gal in here is smoking and what are you waiting for.??" And if offer comes to you in the form of "Bidi Jailaeele Jigar se piya", it become inevitable to conserve the many masculine things. But its a good experience smoking with them.

7. This Movie:

If you have not yet seen this then please, please, please see it. In the first half watching, I can not ever resist the temptation of smoking. And I take almost two to three fags.The hero, Nick Naylor, is tobacco lobbyist in this film.

Later half is little preaching. But the way this hero sales the smoking is outrageous. Very very impressive. The film clearly - and repeatedly - hammers home the point that in our culture, any viewpoint can be defended with the right tactics, regardless of truth or ethics.

The best part I liked in this film is Naylor and his alcohol lobbyist friends, meets every week and jokingly calls themselves as MOD squad, Merchants of Death.

So, this movie always acts as a catalyst for me to have one fag.

8. Emotional tides and ebbs:

Needless to say, noone is deprived of the privilege of going through emotional traumas. Of course, cigarette of alcohol is not at al the solution to anything. But yes, I do agree and have experienced, it helps minimise the effects. On rare occassions that I clearly remember I had smoked when I was sad. But I do make a point to not smoke on the same sad occasions. I remember I smoked a whole packet of 20 cigarrettes when my parents sold my 20 yrs old bicycle when I was away from home. I was truly sad at that time and was cursing everything. The occasion was the death of my beloved. well, I should not remember this in this ill sinusital stage as I am feeling to have a fag.

Heartbreak had played its role in the early teen. But I have shortened my learning curve so no more sadness n all. Everything is cool.

9. Exotic Brands:

I always believe in trying out new things, new places, new food, new living styles and what not. So how cigarettes can be an exception?

Any new brand that is rare is my turn on to hava a fag. As I have tried 350 bucks/ pc cigarette, so the 5bucks/ 50pcs bidis. eww.. but please do stay away from bidis. Bad very bad.

10. Friends and beloveds:

whooaa.. finally reached on 10th..!! Obviously, my list is incomplete without mentioning my beloveds in smoking list. There are very rare people or call them friends whom I am comfortable smoking. This is because they maintain certain class. And I love the way the sharing of thoughts goes on with each fag. On top of my list is my younger bro. Sometimes I feel he is very elder to me as kind of maturity he displays. He alwyas accuses me for being crazy and weired for most of the times, but I know in deep of heart he likes my way. I so miss him as he is away working for stupid IT stuff. Sitting on the bench near the lake in my town and having a fag is our big time memory.

And of course, when its a reunion of school and college buddies, it always calls for a fag.

Ohh..My God.. I forgot the most important one..!!

11. Emraan Hashmi:

Since the year 2004, Emraan Hashmi has created a big inferiority complex in all the Indian male community. Murder released that year. And till date the comple has its place. The reason was and is having being previliged of getting a tag of "Serial Kisser" by acting the same. We as a student had and have the same complex cum a bit of jealousy for his God gift.

I remember, we came out of the theatre after watching Murder and had 3 fags in series, the comment was "saala.. doston at least serial smoker toh bano". Since then whenevr his movie releases, we get on conference from different parts of the planet, curse him, and have a Fag. Silly.. but fact. !!

uff.. I am through with the thing. The important thing to mention is I have tremendously taken a backstep on smoking as the turn ons mentioned above are very rare these days and all my best buddies do not like me smoking. And I truly feel to respect their affection towards me.

Today is 27th day, I have not smoked.

Well, regarding tagging. I donot know whom should I tag? All my followers are very very good girls. So I am puzzeled. If anyone you smoke then feel free to get these tag, else I am tagging all the other non followers of my blog who smoke.

Enough for the day. Going through fever and have taken two injections in upper borders of both the eyebrows for sinus.

All the Love and hugs(ya it works.)

Shantanu. :)

Bad.. too bad.!!

2010-07-01T21:25:00.000+05:30

I already knew yesterday night, it will happen. This is one of the pathetic feelings I ever get before Sinus hit me.. aaaaaaAAaa.. this is how I am screaming now out of this ache...

Dip / Splurgy before even doing "Pissing things" tag, I am announcing here. This sinus not only piss me off, it sucks, I hate this thing from the bottom of my heart.

Not able to focus on anything. So many things left to be done, tags, drama rehearsals, writings, roaming.. Not even able to see TV or Laptop. I am writing this wearing my shades, this is 9.22pm.. wtf man..!! N why mom scolding for this if she knew..

ciao guys..

Ganpati bappa.. sinus kyun banaya.?? :( ):

Excerpt from My Bible.

2010-06-24T23:39:00.001+05:30

"The question is not who is going to allow me,

its who is gonna stop me." - Ayn Rand.

One of the best excerpt from Ayn Rand's, The Fountainhead. This is the seventh time I am reading this book.

To me, its nothing lesser than Geeta, Bible or Quran. Published in 1953, its still the bestseller at every outlet.

Following words are through a character of Howard Roark. He should be my separate blog post.

You wont regret reading this.The grace of Objectivity.

"Nothing is given to man on earth. Everything he needs has to be produced. And here man faces his basic alternatives : he can survive in only one of two ways - by the independent work of his own mind or as a parasite fed by the minds of others.

The creator originates. The parasite borrows. The creator faces nature alone. The parasite faces nature through an intermediary.

The creator's concern is the conquest of nature. The parasite's concern is the conquest of men.

The creator lives for his work. He needs no other men. His primary goal is within himself. The parasite lives second-hand. He needs other. Others become his prime motive.

The basic need of the creator is independence. The reasoning mind cannot work under any form of compulsion. It cannot be curbed, sacrificed or subordinated by any consideration whatsoever. It demands total independence in function and in motive.

To a creator, all relations with men are secondary.

The basic need of second-hander is to secure his ties with men in order to be fed. He places relations first. He declares that man exists in order to serve others. He preaches altruism.

NO MAN CAN LIVE FOR ANOTHER. He cannot share his spirit just as he cannot share his body. The man who attempts to live for others is a dependent.

The relationship produces nothing but a mutual corruption. It is impossible in concept. The nearest approach to it in reality - the man who lives for others - is the slave.

The conquered slave has a vestige of honour. He has the merit of having resisted and considering his condition evil. But the man who enslaves him voluntarily in the name of love is the basest of creatures. He degrades the dignity of man and degrades the conception of love. But this is the essence of altruism."

Rockstar II - Steve Waugh.!

2010-06-21T22:54:00.001+05:30

It will be a little bigger post. Don't mind.

To me he's a Booster of Adrenaline.

Needless to say, I am writing after quite a long space. Family first. So, here I am continuing "My Rockstar" series. Earlier, I had thought I would write only about Steve Waugh, but I think I should include my JCWP, Jimmy Carter Work Project, buddies because of whom I could meet Steve.

ok.. I still remember the date. It was 22nd December 2005, when I finished reading his autobiography "Out of my comfort zone" at 1.30am and wished sitting on commode, eyes closed, slow breath,"God please I want to meet him." and then I forgot about it. But who knew I was on the way to meet him and not only that and stay with him for 7 days. whoaa.. I just get goose bumps when I remeber those days.

It was my college because of whom I could make it. From my school days only, I am in habit to indulge in all kinds of odd stuff that normal people hates to do. No, not to grab attention or just for the sake. Its so natural I am rarely in tune with civilians.Crazy, weird, nocturnals, travelers, solitary things,I always get attracted to. Such odd stuff was displayed on notice board.

So, one day it was announced in college that they need volunteers to build homes for unprivileged and poor people. To be more precise they needed lobours who can carry bricks, mix mortar and concrete, climb on the slabs, install the toilet pots, clean the shit, work full time, who are not obesse so eat less. And all this for free. So imagine the response. It was almost null. It clicked, it was my cup of tea. Hit It.! By the end of that week, we only 20 guys, including girls were on the list. Girls, because it was a rumor that Salman Khan will inaugurate the thing. Then I didn't even know it was Jimmy Carter Work Project and Habitat initiative.

The venue was Malavali, Lonavala. Its on Mumbai- Pune expressway. Someday in October 2006. As soon as we entered we were split into groups on different projects. There were around 50 houses supposed to get built. Mine was House no.36. Some papers were handed over to me which contained all the details like nature of work, team members, agenda, break timings. Everything so much thoughtful and planned. First shock came when I saw the first page, the welcome note, was signed by His Highness Jimmy Carter, yes.. 39th President of The US. I was like... it was shock, surprise, enthusiasm, adrenaline rush.!!

He was 86 then but so youthful when he spoke for 40 min. It was a lifetime experience for a mediocre like me. As I went ahead through papers, the first name in the team list was Steve Waugh and I was about to faint. The law of attraction actually exist, isn't it? I thought. It was not the only surprise, there were many Hollywood and non Hollywood international celebrities present at the place, see the last pic and you'll believe.

Then I went to search for House No.36 and while on the road there were so many thoughts going on in my mind. What will I speak with him.? How will he react? What will I do? n many more things. And finally when I found the house, it was little more biiger shock as Steve has already begun the work. He was all alone with the security and he was down on squats, handgloves on and was doing brick work.

Steve, while taking a breath.

Belive me, you cannot buy this kind of happiness with any kind money. You start beliving in God when this kind of a thing happens. I went ahead greeted him and to my surprise he greeted me with,"you must Shan, Shantanu (while looking at papers), Hi I am Steve." AND that was OMG feeling for me..I was speechless, I couldnt utter a word.

Meha from Singapore and Robert from NYC, our other teammates.

As the day proceeded, a human was getting unfolded in front of me. Trust me, I was feeling too much awkward while working there as I was the youngest, inexperienced and was very raw. But Steve and everyone in the group brought themselves to my level and by the end of 7 days together I was totally a transformed person.

Me with WILL

Steve has displayed an immense respect towards every team mate regardless of race, gender n all. He was never afraid to do any kind of a job that adds to a progress of a projcet. Discipline is one thing that I learnt in detail from him. From disciplining the mind to discipling the fellow workers. On all the 7 days of a work, he was always the first one to arrive at the place, well equipped sharp at 6.30am. He rarely spoke when we were working, worked with very high focus. He always works on cause and effect theory and is very aware about the thing why he is doing it.

Steve on the roll.

Lunch time(see me in background, writing in Steves' notebook)

This is the place when he usually spoke to me to us. He discussed so many things about career, life, spirituality, humanity, ambitions, values n what not. I learnt, while all the talks going on, what makes a great player, a great person.! Very simple, its simplicity, in thoughts, in actions. No pretensions, no ostentation. Discipline, Never say die attitude, Respect. The vital of all HOW TO KEEP COOL. I have never seen such a cool person, no matter what the situation is. And no wonder he is such a successful captain in australian cricket history.

All said and done, we discussed his book. He narrated Curtley Ambrose incident that he mentioned in his book.How to play mind games..if you read that book you'll get the essence.

Since then he is my mentor, buddy and what not.

She was also there for 10 min. Hate her.

with Buddies.

"ya..its true we meet people, often, successful, failures, happy, sad, cripers, optimists, pessimists, diplomats and with so many shades. Its upto you what do you want to take from them, its upto you to be happy or unhappy." I still remember his sentence and try to follow.

The Baby

Thanks JCWP and Habitat. The very next year it was in NYC n it was heaven.

Luck and prayers for you Steve. I wish you read this.

he was also there, TROY, by himself, Brad Pitt.

PS - I am not doing a proofread of this.(I am on "My Rockstars series". Next is Sanjeev Kumar, no not that film hero)

Role Change..

2010-06-16T00:39:00.000+05:30

Sometimes job rotation is inevitable. I am experiencing the same. Mom slipped in the bathroom 3 days ago. Dad is in the hospital for food poisoning since 2 days.!

So I am the only parent they have with them. Little bro is caught up with work load, that's not an issue. Its an enlightenment to play this role. From garden to kitchen, from buying vegis to buying kirana, from chopping onion to chopping finger, ouch lil bleeded, didnt tell anyone, from breakfast to dinner, from dudhwala to kachrawala n what not.

Parents faces and do so many things for me, daily.

And I am so happy I am doing at least this bit for them, of course I didn't want this way but cant help it.

The thought is : I just love u Mom, dad salute to u.!

Wanted cigarette today, but donot know why did I avoid it? ya, changes are in evitable.

Rockstar I - kArInaA..!!!! 8-)

2010-06-12T00:21:00.002+05:30

tHe BSt wAy tO wRitE aBOut BeBoO Izz tO wRitE lIke hErR..!! LoL..!! n mAkeE hEr sMIleE.. rIghT bEbo.! sEE shE iz sMiLing. :)

THis iz KarinaA aKa BebO..! my oldest virtual buddy. This time thanks to FB.

ok.. now for this blog, as it is totally dedicated to her only, I have decided to create Karina aura in my blog today. Everything now YEW (as she taught me) are seeing here is Bebo, everything about her that I was able to know till date. Its fantastic actually, to know this girl.! very genuine feeling.

Its not kind of a testimonial and all.. But ya, sort of.! Jo bhi hai.. You know its been more than a year that we are friends now, ya I also sometimes feel like "Aww..." but its so true. Now, I really dont remember who among us sent the friend request first. But I am sure, it must have clicked to one of us.

I can say, it was Option D, if you saw Slumdog Millionaire, Destined, and so gloriously destined in our case.

Its so good naa..

I mean I had never experienced this kind of a friendship, virtual, with so much affection and warmth and the most important selfless attachment. We both know we have nothing to gain from each other. And belive me, still Bebo has helped me out in many of the situations. Its not thank you wala thing but seriously I should be grateful to her as a person for showing tremendous maturity towards someone, that too like me, you hardly know.!! fNkewWwwwwwW...babO..! (yew'll see these kinda words intermmitently..she taught me :D)

Recently she has taught me how to make a smiley using tabs, fabulous.! One of the most adoerabl thing that I shall endorse Bebo for is Respect.! May sound weired, she has a tremendous respect faahh..friends, good friends of course, their friendship. And I am so fortunate that I dont think anyone else would have experienced thid. Yes, and at the same time she is hard on loafers, in fact she knows how to handle them. Thats brilliant. You know Bebo's fav word.. LoL..! I have counted it..till now Bebo tumne approx 688times LoL bola hai.. ;) awWW..na.!! 8-)

I always abhor flattering and psychofancy, so whatever I am wrting is straight from the heart and very practical, infact. One of the most fabulous things about Bebo is she is very much concious about her appearence. I have never seen without a good attire, a smile on the face and yes I always admire her bangles or bracelets she wears..OSMmmm bebo.. seriously they are so unique, I tell you. See above, see below.

I mean, isnt it giving good vibes.? of course, it is.! Certainly, she has her style mantra at a very right age.!

So, What does she love the most.?

mmm.. ok.! as far as I have guessed she loves folloing:

1. she loves her friends a lot, lot..! 2. She loves all the cuteness in the world, see pics below

3. She loves Megha. 4 She loves SUN.ya true.! (Bebo..I forgot to put that pic, sun wali) 5. She loves pakodas. 6.n ya.. she loves sneakers, alot.! see that pic as well.! 7. she loves HILARY DUF, infact, its common among us. 8. she loves Miley Cyrus, Hana Montana, she loves parties.

9. She loves soccer. I am not sure, but little sure.!! ;) 10.She loves palak paneer. 11. she loves sandals. 12. she loves Blue.13. She is MAD about PINK..!! 14. her nail polish is fantastic. 15. she loves FB..15. Loves dresses, loves music.!

Bani preet is in her Top Friends list. (Bani Im Jel.. LOL.!!)

with Bani

She hates...mm I dont know much about except Rains.. Yes Bebo dont like rains, waise she like it, but dnt like to get drenched n all.And she hates oversmart boys.

So, what is Bebo to me.? To me, she is da bestest buddyy..who is always there with all her strengths to help me. What else do you need from a friend.!!! Also, to me she is like princes, whos' gona rule the world with her charm and witt.! Surely.

Last word to bebo. you will always be my sweetheart and a darling friend. I canot imagine my day would ever be complete without talking with you. I shall always pray for you a good life, a caring boyfriend, precious true friends, success, smiles and everything you want. OMG.. bebo kitna tarif kiya tera..! I shall always be there for you and surely would like to see you someday in next years of life.

all the best..!! huggsss.. n kisses..!!

fankkkewWwwww..!! ;-)

PICS COurtesy : KArina.. !

(p.s. I am on MY Rockstar series, My best virtual buddies, Next is Steve Waugh.)

My Rockstars..! The Series.

2010-06-10T00:52:00.000+05:30

Since the day I posted "We, The Living", my stay at poachers' home story, something was going on in my head. I was unable to figure it out, I do not think that much though. But yes, happens sometimes.!! And so I could not write anything for some days. I was just reading and reading to find out the answer, what is it that I am searching to write when I am having 'n' number of things to write, my recent victories, sorrows, good, bad, philosophies.

I always have decided to stay happy regardless of circumstances, seriously. And I am happy to have followed that. My happiness is not dependent, that is quite I like the most about me. Making my friends happy is another way to be happy that I found. Yes, but no expectations in return hnn..! That hurts then..and alot. There are so many people around me.

Good or bad is like black or white, but in that gray area there exists loads of shades of endless human emotions. And I have just realized that I have met and I know so may different people across cultures, castes, religions, countries, value systems and what not. Almost all are good friends, some are teachers, some are motivators. For a second I gave it a thought to write about them. But naahh.. maja nahi aya.!! Thats not me..!

Lets do it differently, I thought. This time something for all my virtual friends. Yeahh, adrenaline uppp.!! Of course, they have an immense importance here in my life. They are even a bit more closer than real ones sometimes. I share all my feelings with them, they make me smile in tough times. Mean alot. To give it a proper justice I am going to include my those buddies also who were my real friends for some time but some how inevitably they gone virtual but the feelings are not lesser than a real one.

So, from tomorrow onwards, I shall write about all my virtual buddies, one at a time as I see them, perceive them. Some are totally virtual, never met them, but they are all my inspiration when I chat with them, exchange mails. Some are Indians, punjabis, sauthha Indians, Bengali, Bihari, Bhojpuri, Gujrati, Some Australians, Americans, many more. I am sure it will be a good trip for those who will read this as I have travelled across all the human continents of ego, selfishness, selflessness, greeds, deeds, virtues, values and what not.

The reason why I do not get angry very easily and totally believe in not giving up on any relation.

Here the list goes of my buddies.:

Abraham Lincoln, No, not The 16th US President, But he is certainly The Man of Virtue. He is 76 years old Ohio resident. A vivid ornithologist and an environment scientist.

Karina, No, not Kapoor. She is the youngest of all my virtual buddies and my day is incomplete without her.

Tamalika, The brainy filmy stuff.

Steve Waugh, Yes Former Australian Captain. We have done some of miraculous work together at Jimmy Carter Work Project.

Jimmy Carter, Yes The former US President.

Shobha De, everyone knows her.

Sanjeev Kumar, in Kolkata we boozed like a fish, now here I miss him a lot.

And I have some more names in my mind. Lets see how it work out.

Mainly, I shall be mentioning my views on them, good or bad, their likes, dislikes, their interests, turn ons, turn offs, how they ar important to me, their view to take life and everything that will come to my mind.

I shall just pray they read this. Yes, its a matter immaterial as I write for my own happiness and if someone derives something from I'll be more than happy. They all are my sweethearts and they have just Rocked my world in every possible way..!!

Starting with KaRiNaA., the BeBo.!

We, The Living.!

2010-06-03T01:14:00.001+05:30

The Place we Lived.!

Yes.. the title is of Ayn Rands' book, but we actually experienced the thing yesterday. What does it takes to be a poacher aka pardhi, as they are commonly called here.?

I was almost on the verge to break down when we saw a flock of around 2000 domsile crains, birds, landing in front of our eyes. It was spellbound and I canot even think to describe this. As we saw them landing on the front coast, they formed a uniform otrageous line along right to left of the lake.

It was like, that thing was like a law of nature - that one cannot question, alter or implore, just witness and shut up.!

For three hours we were in a baby pose, in crawling, me and my Olympus, all drenched with marsh, mud, as it had rained last night, fungus and what not. I wished time should have stopped, but in vain.. good times and bad ones, they never last.

As we were on the "wow" pose, suddenly flock took a flight agan in the pink sky and to our surprise two human figures were coming out of flock. Surprise, n all surprise.!! what the hell was that..we were like.!! We started pouring MCBC galis with full throtle on. They were approaching us with some dead bodies in their hands, birds dead bodies.

In than five seconds we understood that they were poachers and they had trapped around 10-15 birds, was ridiculous, my thought at that point. As they we were getting closer to us, we already had dialed forest rangers' phone, the thing that they also had understood..

When they were infront of my eyes, I witnessed two 10 yr old boys in their shorts and only two nylon ropes. For a moment I did stun with the thought that how one can catch so many birds with only two thin ropes. As expected, emotional drama started. They began to crib and were trying to convince us to not to call police. But by that time my buddy was already on call and handed over a phone to me.

Ranger knew all these things, poaching and all. He told me that he'll be here in an hour and to wait there. OK. The boys were on the verge to cry and started telling their familys' pathetic condition and cribs, cribs and cribs. It was not a routine thing for us to feel so bad. Helplessly, I asked them where do they stay.? They requested us to come with them as they were living nearby.

Danger. Obviously, we thought as they were poachers. But thankfully we both had our military knifes, got from Corbet, so we didnt hesitated too much. The only thing to worry was our binos. They took us to the place, See the pic.! It was as miserable as that anyone cannot even dare to imagine. They have built their house, Tambu sort, to be more precise, with all the waste cloths that are available on the earth.

It was terrible. 11 people were there in family. Illiteracy. But too much of love for everyone. A high quality parental care and warmth. They were not bothered about what tomorrow. Their only goal was to live today in the most happiest way. Poaching and selling the meat was their only mode of income, survival. By the time we observed all this and had a dialogue, we were already in their home.

No show offs, no ostentation, only the harsh reality inside. For a moment I thought, we keep fighting over a nonsense issues when life is so comfortable for us and see here. They requested us to have food and stay there at there home. It was a very awkward situation. But somehow, we reached to the decision that we'll stay only till 4 am and then will move. Fine.!

In an hour got the call from my ranger friend to find out where were we. Explained everything. No legal actions and all. We didnt want to make it more miserable for them.

We were inside for 4 hrs, had their typical Pardhi food, all laced with meat. No sleep. Only mind boggling thoughts. We got up at 3.30am. As we were on the highway, a desperate thought crossed in both of us' mind, "Man, have to have beer. Its too much."

4 Beers at 3.55am at Veer-da-dhaba.

Shantanu.

Whistled..!!

2010-05-31T22:48:00.001+05:30

Laser whistling ducks

Since 2 days sinus was like killing me from inside out. The pain had encroached its area till my left ear, thanks to Sinarest and Procillin. It was a bit relief. Couldn't sleep whole of yesterday night. And finally, as it always happens, I got up and called up my buddy. It was 5am.

Its an unwritten rule between us, whenever any one of us calls at the odd morning time, its time a of Birdwatching. Packed my bag with my Olympus binos, shades, camouflage cap and jeans, kurta and my bike. All setup, rode towards his home. At 5.30, we were on highway towards our birdwatching destination. That Sacred Lake.

The Sun was almost out, as its summer, and we had no fascination to see sunrise as it loses its a bit charm in summer or may be we were not interested.

Reached at lake at 5.50. And she welcomed us with a brilliant flamboyant yellowish red colors of Flamingos. Awesome. I would advise to all best buddies and well wishers to take a glance of this bird at least once in a life. Its a lifetime experience to see a flock of 300 flamingos in front on the eyes.

Takes loads and tonns of patience, of course, else they get scattered and the result is spoiled view. When we are out on birdwatching we hardly talk. Its just our binoculars speaks.

The real real fun was with Laser whistling ducks. And actually it takes a bit more nerve wrecking efforts to listen them whistling. Its not that they whistle in low volume, its the right time they chose to whistle. But yes.. its an unmatched musical experience one can ever have. We had.

White Ibis

Yes.. This is white ibis. Watching her is also much fun as she digs down the earth for her food with her digger shaped beak. All the morning it was fun and enriching the knowledge with Black winged stilts, crusted larks, roody shellducks, egrets, ring plovers.

And finally, on the bank this lake there was a Ganesh temple. So, all started and ended well with a great birding.

Sinus, gone :) back home by 10.30am.

Love.

Shantanu :)

The Vocal Heart .!!

2010-05-31T00:58:00.001+05:30

Not loving her would be a sin or may would prove me a gay which I am certainly not. She is so in touch with herself, dreaming with all her senses, that one cannot afford to miss even a loss of her single glimpse of this state.

Romance has its own charm. Don't you deny it. Hormonal tides and ebbs, comes and goes, but romance stays, its divine. Look at the passion she is displaying. Its so stunning. Even fantasizing to be with her is so refreshing you know.

Mad boy, I know. Let it be.

She is like a dream girlfriend that one can ever imagine to have. No, not a housewife and all material, naah.. She is an angel, you can just love her with all your hearts open. Its what we can call as, the beauty personified or redefined or whatever. yess.. Flawless..!!

The pure and platonic, inside out. No plotting, no games. The only best thing she can you is a pure unconditional love. I am lucky to have at least her pic.

She is the calm of a hurricane's eye
where a man finds tranquility
as the storm passes by..!!

Love.

Luck. Shan :)

Fahh.. your SMILE only.!! :)

2010-05-27T21:03:00.008+05:30

My life has no purpose, no direction, no aim, no meaning and yet I am happy. I cant' figure it out. What am I doing right.? huuhh.. Its certainly not my thought, but the state of course. This is by Charles Schulz, an American cartoonist who created a comic "Peanuts" and put millions of smiles on human faces. Most of us knows this. This is how I experienced his thought.

Just 2-3 hours ago, I was on my bike to get my Moms' blood sugar report, its not that normal but regular walks can control that. So I was like chill. Riding a bike, only in the evening, is fav to-do thing on my daily schedule these days. It was as always a cool soothing air and Akons' "Beautiful" was buzzing in my ear phone, its just the fantastic being in such state. Akon, bike, cool winds, no jerky roads and very rare traffic. I just feel like 'The Salvation". Being with myself and pampering like are my nowadays- buzz words.

Cars, bikes, and others were passing by. I was watching them, shooking my head on the rhythm of songs buzzing . It was all going fun as usual. Then in a moment of fraction one Scorpio was passed very rashly, that too overtaking me. It was like a bad stroke which suddenly whirled my epinephrine and then chase began. Overtook in 2 min.

Then again the same thing, overtaking. This time again the same Scorpio. By the time we did a rounds of this overtake-thing 2 to 3 times, I very seriously noticed that someone inside the car was enjoying this with all the heavy laughter. On the careful observation I realized that she was a someone as cute as Angel, around 3 to 4 years of age.

Whenever I overtook, she used to become sad. And whenever her car overtook me, she had all the joys of victory on her face. It was feeling so satisfying to look her smiling that for sometime I thought is it only this small thing that can make her happy, that can make her smile.? Awesomee..!! Of course, the few wonders of the world exist while there are those with the sight to see them.

For some times I won the race and for most of the times I lost. Have you ever witnessed that sweet, innocent and selfless smile.? Anything for that.. The best part comes now. While I was on my winning and losing marathon, she was well aware that I was losing intentionally, and I was shocked to notice this awareness. The time came when I smiled at her and was bidding goodbye gesture "bybye" by shooking my left hand as I had to take turn.

To my surprise, she called me with her small right hand by "come here" gesture. We were in motion, there was hardly a time to think what were her intentions. I didn't think much and went closer by. As soon as I reached near her rear window she handed over me a small folding of papers, many papers and thrown flying kisses, byebyes. I kept those inside my shirt and replied her with the same kisses and byes. Happily departed.

I was like on the top of the world. It was just a feeling of something good was moving inside. I dont know what it was.! infact what it is.. uhh..!! After 5 min, I stopped for fag n tea near my patented tapri. I took one sip and removed those papers from inside my Tee to see what it was. And guess what it was.. "Peanuts" by Charles Schulz.

I am still touched.

Luck. Shan :)

The "M" Factor - MARD

2010-05-27T00:56:00.001+05:30

Frankly, this "M" factor is haunting me since some last two or so years, when I saw the bolly hit movie "Mard" very seriously. From that time to till date I am kind of harassing almost all of my friends with the dialogues of this movie that I mu med consciously..

See these powerproof words below, I just love them and I have tried on nearby 20 to 25 girls and have got a great astonishing response:

Its a scene when Amrita Singh hits her car to ABs' traditional "Maa" Nirupaa Roy and she gets injured. At the same time AB is passing by with his tanga, horsecart. He then indulges in fight with her bodyguard.

After all the dhishum dhishum..

Amrita: kya naam hai tumhara.?

AB: wahi jo har aurat ke jubaa pe hotahai. (chest scene and in the back ground 5 men shouts MARD MARDMARD) then movie title appears as shown in the side pic.

and he shows his chest, see ABs' pic on the side, where MARD is sculpted by his father with sharp knife, see the blood(y) pic, in his new born days.

Then he receives public appreciation where public collectively says," Jiske seene mein dusron keliye dard hota hai, wahi MARD hota hai."

Just imagine me throwing these dialogues at the right time, it works. I don't know for what it works, but you suddenly become best buddy of all. No impressing girls n all haan, I avoid it. Its useless, girls smells it immediately and avoids you..

So, why, why the hell am I pouring all this in here and sharing with you guys.? To be very frank, I was writing some comment on The Splurgerinas' blog post yesterday and there I mentioned something about Dard and Mard n all.. So it did strike very badly to what does it exactly mean, Mard.? From mens' point of view.

Is it just the only thing to dominate the female and be superior physically.? or shout on her and get the work done as a slave..? or tolerating those Sharp Knife sculptures on the chest. I guess gone are those days, wont work now. Today its all about the changed definitions. It was OK in the Mard days, late 80s. Now stakes are very high, I guess. No,, seriously. Its pretty easy to do all these things, even to get blood(y) tattoo of your gf on your arm. There is something more to it, to be a Mard.

Its a tough job being a Todays' Mard. You have to prove yourself at each and every step. Its not about getting superior to any or to entire female community, being a feminist I also always believe in empowering the Right females. Its not that issue. Ropewalk, yes not less than a ropewalk. Being Mard is a character, it may be male or female as far as I view this, because its a command, an earned respect for the purpose you have achieved by putting all the necessary efforts, by sacrificing, and deserving the victory.

May sound weired or absurd, may be..!! But deserving the victory is not the only masculine right.. right.! Females equally, sometimes little more, put in all the efforts to all the things that a man can do. yes yes, its not any female empowerment article, but its fact naa..! So I feel Mard is a character than any male or female on this planet can play. Also, I feel that its tagged only with males because since ancient times male is a breadwinner. Not anymore.

At the same time its an Ego.! Belive me not all the males don't feel that happy to see the female counterpart earning head to head with them., not all men are Shantanu ;) lol.. but true. So, what bothers them.? what exactly todays' Mard feels..? Has it given a rise to cut throat competition, glass ceiling, rapes, psycho fancy of bosses, ditching, dumping, two timings, frustrations, depressions..n what not.? Yes.. certainly it has given rise to all this. And all this for what..!!

Quite sometime back, I was going through some rape stats n all, wont go in percentage thing, but the reasons. As per the UN report the major causes are anger, desire for power, sadism, evolutionary pressures and lastly sexual gratification. So, whats going wrong.? I guess, somehow males are feeling a missing of that string, acceptance. Lets face it, not every soldier can become Achilles, if you have seen Troy you'll get it. So, the pressure of being an Achilles is mounting, as I can see around.

He faces abusing boss at office, gets pissed of between wife and a mom at home, his children thinks he is incompetent as he has not changed his car since two years, no enough time for friends, alcohol and fag gives him relief but socially unacceptable.. Sounds suffocating, right..!! Lets see bachelors.. almost burn out to impress girlfriend with all the unnecessary things, ostentation's as The Splugerina calls, whose half life is not even bigger than that of our mobiles' battery life. Status.. Is it all that girls want.?? Not all girls of course..

But take my word, he can go to any darn extent to prove his mettle to his girl, boy, wife, or whatever.. Its like that only. For a man, a real man, his biggest achievement in his life is to be able to nurture his family or beloved with his stroke of efforts and to not to get anything in return, but The Love. And the biggest disappointment or pain is not able to do so. My view of course. It may differ widely. For some pain is to his gf with other n lots more things are there. But for these things time cures these wounds.

So, to me this "The M Factor" is really concerned with the purpose of a man in his life - to work, to create, to excel, and to be concerned about his world and its affairs. Loads and loads has been written in Bhagwadgeeta, Bible and in many more holy pages about the Man, his purpose and lot more philosophy is there. Don't want to touch spirituality and all, I am not that literate. I always vote for a man is equal to beer as both are available in stronger and milder forms. Strong beer goes through many tough stages of distillation to gain its existence, so as a strong man to become a MARD and vice-versa.

Finally, after all the gyaan and all, time to chill. Lets stay happy and love ourselves as we are.

And love beer as well. Its Gods' The best creation after man.

Luck. Shan :)

ofcourse i love you, till I find someone better..!!

2010-01-05T12:07:00.000+05:30

Only very recently, to be more precise on the new years' night (rather early morning) at 5.30am, finished reading this book. Of course I love you, till I find someone better. This one is by my good pal Manavi Ahuja, and Durjoy, dont know him. Both are just college grads.

It was a humble and humiliating experience while reading the same. It has everything in it that any bachelor boy or girl have to experience inevitably or by choice or by his / her stubbornness to repeat the same past mistakes from the day he / she becomes an adult till the marriage, and of course beyond the marriage, what we generally call these days as EMA (extramarital affairs).

Break ups, hook ups, make outs, ditching, dumping, EMAs, live-ins, one night-stands, friends, so called best friends, disappointments n everything that we can find in today's so called illusion called relationships we can find in this book. Nevertheless book contains all this, it doesn't stop on these craps only. It has very beautifully portrait ed the very basic element that is missing in every of these relationships, Love of course. And also a tiny element of every youngsters life which has been conveniently overlooked, The God.!!

At this point of my journey, i have kind of given up to think what exactly it is and frankly speaking i have no right to judge and express anything about this as i am enjoying well my khulla-saand wala time ;) ..

Anyways, but being an adult mysterio i can observe and avoid doing mistakes that i have witnessed throughout and can help those cripping souls around me, at least can try, what else.!!

Lets say.. -

we, now i am including myself as well, are passing through all these different loves, love of parents, love for friends, love for spouse and so forth. We slowly exercise the faculty of love, but in the majority of cases we never learn anything from it, we become bound to one step, to one person. In some cases men come out of these bondage. Men are ever running after wives, wealth, and fame and noone is exception to this. Noone in this world can really love anything but God.

This is how it is, read ahead. This is not a spiritual lecture, but the hard truth learned through good lessons.

Men cannot love though they talk of it, i am also not an exception to this. The wife says she loves her husband and kisses him; but asa he dies, the first thing she thinks about is the bank account, and what she will do next day. The husband loves the wife, but when she becomes sick, and loses her beauty, or becomes haggard, or makes a mistakes he ceases to care for her.

As Mr. Narendra Dutt says, all the love of the world is hypocrisy and hollowness. He is Swami Vivekananda, btw. Sometimes looks true. But its unavoidable, we are a part of this cycle, something called karmayoga.

we grasp something, and find it slips through our fingers, and then we grasp something else. Thus, we go on and on, till the last light comes. ohh.. wats that..!! someone whose love knows no change, and ever ready to take us in. He in whose mind is no anger, hatred or envy etc.. lil heavy one.

lets see one another classic example ;

girlfriend or wife for the matter of fact and to avoid other dilemmas, loves her husband. She thinks that her whole soul is absorbed in him; a baby comes , and half of it goes out to the baby, or somewhat more. She herself feels that her love for her husband does not exist now as it was before. so with the husband.

We always find that when more intense objects of love come to us the previous love slowly vanishes. Similar is the case with children, animals and with the whole lot of finite objects which are made up of 5 basic elements.

One star arises , another bigger one comes , and then still a bigger one, and at last the sun comes, and all the lesser lights vanish. who's that sun btw..? some creatures have it but donot realise the same until they loose him.. some may keep trying and donot realise that that was the previous one. When that sun bursts upon him, a man becomes what emerson calls it as "God-intoxicated man".. too heavy for me.

That is what keeps happening in "of course i love u.."

what it sends is, love never comes until there is freedom. There is no love possible in slave. If you buy a slave, he'll work for you, but like a drudge. There will be no love in him. Every act of love brings happiness and peace and blessedness in its reaction.

suppose a man loves a woman; he wishes to have her all to himself and feels extremely jealous every moment, he wants her to sit near him, to stand near him, and to eat and to move at his bidding. He is a slave to her and wishes her as his slave. This is kind of a regular picture in the relationships today. This is not love; it is a kind of morbid affection of the love, insinuating itself as love. Then we go for the next one, and the next and next.

It cannot be love, because everytime it brings about painful reaction with it. With love there is nothing like pain, it has only reaction of bliss.

So.. whats the catch..? should we stop searching. give up. or indulge till we find someone better.

to me its very simple. We always receive, what we have given. good things happens to good people. Friends, someone we should never give up on.

the book is a good to read.

To the one who doesn't need to read it..

2009-11-20T11:39:00.000+05:30

Nothing is given to man on earth. Everything he needs has to be produced. And here man faces his basic alternatives : he can survive in only one of two ways - by the independent work of his own mind or as a parasite fed by the minds of others.

The creator originates. The parasite borrows. The creator faces nature alone. The parasite faces nature through an intermediary.

The creator's concern is the conquest of nature. The parasite's concern is the conquest of men.

The creator lives for his work. He needs no other men. His primary goal is within himself. The parasite lives second-hand. He needs other. Others become his prime motive.

To a creator, all relations with men are secondary.

The basic need of second-hander is to secure his ties with men in order to be fed. He places relations first. He declares that man exists in order to serve others. He preaches altruism.

NO MAN CAN LIVE FOR ANOTHER. He cannot share his spirit just as he cannot share his body. The man who attempts to live for others is a dependent.

The relationship produces nothing but a mutual corruption. It is impossible in concept. The nearest approach to it in reality - the man who lives for others - is the slave.

To the one who doesn't need to read it..

2009-11-20T10:53:00.000+05:30

The creator originates. The parasite borrows. The creator faces nature alone. The parasite faces nature through an intermediary.

The creator's concern is the conquest of nature. The parasite's concern is the conquest of men.

The creator lives for his work. He needs no other men. His primary goal is within himself. The parasite lives second-hand. He needs other. Others become his prime motive.

To a creator, all relations with men are secondary.

The basic need of second-hander is to secure his ties with men in order to be fed. He places relations first. He declares that man exists in order to serve others. He preaches altruism.

NO MAN CAN LIVE FOR ANOTHER. He cannot share his spirit just as he cannot share his body. The man who attempts to live for others is a dependent.

The relationship produces nothing but a mutual corruption. It is impossible in concept. The nearest approach to it in reality - the man who lives for others - is the slave.

The leaves are falling ; so am I...

2009-09-05T10:40:00.000+05:30

Such a touching and meaningful assertions..

THE leaves are falling; so am I;
The few late flowers have moisture in the eye;
So have I too.
Scarcely on any bough is heard
Joyous, or even unjoyous, bird
The whole wood through.

Winter may come: he brings but nigher
His circle (yearly narrowing) to the fire
Where old friends meet.
Let him; now heaven is overcast,
And spring and summer both are past,
And all things sweet.....

-W.S.LANDOR

Unintended at 2.51 am..

2009-08-29T02:29:00.000+05:30

yesterday was very cinematic. i wish I could share all my struggles in one stroke with you. but only one a few is fortunate. just an hour ago had a bit of mindstorming. when i fell asleep, words poured off. cudnt resist sharing with u guys...

afetrall, You are the one with whom i shared my joys

you are the one with whom i shared my sorreows.. remember the last year..

anyways..its 2.51am.. m happy to give it to you.

The good you find in others, is in you too.
The faults you find in others, are your faults as well.
After all, to recognize something you must know it.
The possibilities you see in others, are possible for you as well.

The beauty you see around you, is your beauty.
The world around you is a reflection, a mirror
showing you the person you are.

To change your world, you must change yourself.
To blame and complain will only make matters worse.

Whatever you care about, is your responsibility.
What you see in others, shows you yourself.
See the best in others, and you will be your best.

Give to others, and you give to yourself.
Appreciate beauty, and you will be beautiful.
Admire creativity, and you will be creative.
Love, and you will be loved.

Seek to understand, and you will be understood.
Listen, and your voice will be heard.
Show your best face to the mirror, and you’ll be happy
with the face looking back at you.

Boulevard of Broken Dreams : dedicated to Kaustubh.

2009-08-20T10:25:00.000+05:30

- Shantanu / Kaustubh -

One of the dearest gifts given to me by Kaustubh is this song. We used sit in for hours in Apache, FC road, n listen this song.

Fraankly speaking I am a highly illiterate person in regard with the English songs. Very few I know that too which are very famous. I remember the time when suddenly some english song was being played by the DJ in Apache and Kaustubh used to start bubbling and would try to sing, rather scream, along with the song, and if he then me too. ahhh-- ahhh--ahh--!!!

And I would give a mixture of expressions of unfamiliarity of the song, of the joy for he was being happy, of fact the that we both are together with beer glasses in our hands, of the sadness which we had often faced of missing Avi who had always missed the kind of fun Kaustubh and I had together and offcorse of feeling fortunate for being together. I dont know what kind of expression was that ..!!! only Kaustubh can tell. :P

But one thing I would always make sure to do was to Smile.. :) he likes that.

I think very subjectively, unlike Kaustubh. Probably this is the reason we are the best friends.

Kaustubh has introduced me with the world of some of the most infamous and meaningful firangi songs. Boulevard of Broken dreams is such one of them. Recently he has posted this song on his orkut profile armed with the lyrics and storyline beneath the song.

I believe, somewhere our lives are attached with the words of this song.

This is quite interesting to read for all of you who are going through this blog and who feel handicapped while listening English songs, like me sometimes.

Thanks BHAWA.. !!!

I walk a lonely road

The only one that I have ever known

Don't know where it goes

But it's home to me and I walk alone

I walk this empty street

On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams

Where the city sleeps

and I'm the only one and I walk alone

I walk alone

I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me

My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating

Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me

'Til then I walk alone

Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Aaah-ah,

Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah

I'm walking down the line

That divides me somewhere in my mind

On the border line

Of the edge and where I walk alone

Read between the lines

What's fucked up and everything's alright

Check my vital signs

To know I'm still alive and I walk alone

I walk alone

I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me

My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating

Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me

'Til then I walk alone

Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Aaah-ah

Ah-ah, Ah-ah

I walk alone

I walk a...

I walk this empty street

On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams

Where the city sleeps

And I'm the only one and I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me

My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating

Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me

'Til then I walk alone...

* STORY:

"Boulevard of Broken Dreams" is a song by American punk rock band Green Day, from their seventh studio album, American Idiot. The song was written by Green Day, with lyrics by lead singer Billie Joe Armstrong; it was co-produced by the band and Rob Cavallo. It was released as the album's second single on November 29, 2004; the single peaked at number two in the United States.

The song speaks from the point of view of American Idiot's "main character", Jesus of Suburbia, and is a moderate midtempo song characterized by sombre and bleak lyrics. This is in contrast to the previous track on the album, "Holiday", which illustrates Jesus of Suburbia's "high" of being in The City. MTV's Green Day Makes a Video described "Holiday" as a party, and "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" as the subsequent hangover.

* STORY MUSIC VIDEO:

The award-winning music video for "Boulevard of Broken Dreams", which was directed by Samuel Bayer, depicts the band members after their car has stalled in the desert, and they begin a melancholy walk down a dusty road. Scenes are interspersed with video footage, taken from around Los Angeles, of homeless people and other miserable sights. The video also features performance footage of the band playing the song in an abandoned warehouse.

The music videos for "Holiday" and "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" were filmed with a single, continuous storyline — the video for "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" picks up where "Holiday"'s left off, with the last few seconds of "Holiday" audible at the start of the "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" video.

The video features a 1968 green Mercury Monterey convertible that was modified for filming in the "Holiday" and "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" videos. The car features a hood ornament in the shape of the hand and heart grenade image from the American Idiot album cover, which was also used in the video for "Holiday". But the "iron fist" was actually used in the video for "Walking Contradiction", when the band members meet at a car towards the end of the video. The band's name is also on the front of the hood in silver letters. The band rode this car to the 2005 MTV Video Music Awards ceremony.

As shown in an MTV Making the Video special, director Samuel Bayer used unorthodox techniques to achieve the aged look of the "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" video, including physical damage to the film: scratching the film with razor blades, pouring coffee on it, and smudging cigarettes on it.

The video of "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" won six awards at the MTV Video Music Awards in 2005, most notably for Video of the Year. It also won Best Group Video, Best Rock Video, Best Direction, Best Editing, and Best Cinematography.

The Love Bridge - Some interesting Facts Findings

2009-08-14T16:31:00.000+05:30

When I was incepted in Kolkata before 8 months, there was hardly anything other than my best friend and Howrah Bridge that I knew about.

Gradually, as usual my journey towards exploration then started, to see new places, to learn new language, to experience new feelings and to see life OUT OF THE BOX, its inevitable for me, always, I am born like that only.

Anyways, the journey and experience is astounding. Suddenly, rather recently, I have realised bridges have become an integral and some special part of my Bengali life. Surprised..!!! me too..

See, I stay in Kestopur. For coming here from Salt Lake I have cross either 7 no. bridge or Boishakhi bridge both of them are present in 2 forms : Concrete and Bamboo. amazing structures. I am crossing these bridges since the time I stepped in here. Then I came to know that the case is not onlt with me but almost every Bengali has a special importance of Bridge in his life.

And no wonder that, when you see Howrah Bridge, sounds and feels so True.. Such a giant structure with no pillars below. I have experienced the summer of Kolkata which is almost killing for someone like me who is for the first time in Kolkata directly from little bit warmer n colder place. Its been said that in this heat Howrah Bridge expands by 4ft in the day time. You will believe this when you'll experience the heat.

BTW, for now its Vidyasagar setu aka Twin Howrah Bridge for me, something very closer to the beating side of body.

Lets Bridge the Gaps. The journey will continue...

Fact File
» Cost: Rs. :388 crores
» Established - 1992
» Supported by - 121 wire cables, 457m. Long & 115 m. wide.

Location
Located 2 km.to the south of Howrah Bridge, the Vidyasagar Setu is Kolkata's newest suspension bridge across the Hooghly.

About Vidyasagar Setu
Vidyasagar Setu, also known as second Hooghly Bridge, a Golden Gate Bridge which connects the twin cities of Kolkata and Howrah. The morning scenes of slipping Kolkata from this bridge is simply mind blowing. With 9 lanes of traffic routes the bridge is capable of handling more than 85,000 vehicles every day.

It was built to reduce vehicular pressure from the latter. The construction work took 22 years and cost Rs. 3.88 billion and finally it was opened to traffic officially on 10th October 1992. It is a most sophisticated engineering marvel and the world's third largest cable-stayed bridge. Supported by 121 wire cables, it is 457 m. long and 115 m. wide. This graceful structure stands on four pylons, on a foundation that is 100 m. deep. It affords a panoramic view of the Calcutta skyline. The Vidyasagar Setu or the second Hooghly Bridge spans over the Hooghly River linking Calcutta to its twin city of Howrah and on to Mumbai, Chennai and Delhi. This is a toll bridge and gives a fast connection from downtown Kolkata to the Botanical Gardens (which has the world's biggest banyan tree) and the Bengal Engineering College.

Poems by R.Tagore

2009-08-12T11:10:00.000+05:30

The very reason to display the poems by R. Tagore is the awareness, rather unawareness, i can say, about his compositions. Although, his compositions involved a deep rooted, universal and certain kind vivacious thinking, sometimes the mango man (Aam aadmi aka common man) becomes inevitably handicapped to sip the hidden ideas or to grasp their true sense.

Nevertheless, there are not all of those which deserves the same treatment. displaying below are some of my favorite compos from my collection over the period of time I know the Legend.

This is an appropriate occassion of Independence Day of India to share them with you guys.

Hope you like them.

GRANT ME

Let me not pray to be sheltered from dangers but to be
fearless in facing them.
Let me not beg for the stilling of my pain but for the
heart to conquer it.
Let me not look for allies in life's battlefield but to
my own strength.
Let me not crave in anxious fear to be saved but
hope for the patience to win my freedom.
Grant me that I may not be coward, feeling your mercy
in my success alone; but let me find the
grasp of your hand in my failure.

-Rabindranath Tagore

LET MY COUNTRY AWAKE
Where the mind is without fear and the head is held high;
Where knowledge is free;
Where the world has not been broken up into fragments by narrow domestic walls;
Where the words come out from the depth of truth;
Where tireless striving stretches its arms towards perfection;
Where the clear stream of reason has not lost its way into the dreary desert sand of dead habit;
Where the mind is led forward by thee into ever-widening thought and action --
Into that heaven of freedom, my Father, let my country awake.

-Rabindranath Tagore

Swine Flu..

2009-08-10T14:01:00.000+05:30

There is no need to get panic regarding the current epidemic Swni Flu. Let me rationalise the same alongwith few preventive measures, stepwise -

The Vital sysmptom: Common chest discomfort along with persistent cough.

So, how do you know if you have flu or just cold?
There is one clue: when you have the flu, you feel flu symptoms sooner than you would cold symptoms, and they come on with much greater intensity. With the flu, you may feel very weak and fatigued for up to 2 or 3 weeks. You'll have muscle aches and

periods of chills and sweats as fever comes and goes. You may also have a stuffy or runny nose, headache, and sore throat.

Actions to be taken immediately :

First and foremost is to take medical assistance on following contact details :

Outbreak Monitoring Cell (Control Room, NICD): 011-23921401

For my Pune beloveds:

Pune: Dr. Naidu Infectious Disease Hospital,

Ph: 09923130909

For my Bengali Family:

Beliaghata Infectious Diseases Hospital,

Ph: 09433392182

Drugs being used in the Treatment are mainly Antivirals:
- Oseltamivin commonly known as Tamiflu and
- Zanamivir as Relenza

N.B. : Relenza, not to be administered in the children less than 7 yrs. and Tamiflu less than 1 yr.

These are sureshot drugs but the exact timing of administration and diagnosis are important.

The most important - PREVENTION
Follow this general procedure to reduce the risk of catching or spreading the virus, you should:
Cover your mouth and nose when coughing and sneezing, using a tissue
Throw the tissue away quickly and carefully
Wash your hands regularly with soap and water
Clean hard surfaces (like door handles and remote controls) frequently with a normal cleaning product
Keep away from others as much as possible. This is to keep from making others sick. Do not go to work or school while ill
Stay home for at least 24 hours after fever is gone, except to seek medical care or for other necessities. (Fever should be gone without the use of a fever-reducing medicine.)
Drink clear fluids (such as water, broth, sports drinks, electrolyte beverages for infants) to keep from being dehydrated
Wear a facemask – if available and tolerable – when sharing common spaces with other household members to help prevent spreading the virus to others.

BETTER PREPARE AND PREVENT, THAN REPAIR AND REPENT.

SHANTANU DATAR
B.Sc. (Microbiology & Zoology)
M.Sc. (Biochemistry)
PGP (Human Resources and Marketing)
- Former Associate, National Institute of Virology, Pune
- Former Research Associate at National Center for Cell Sciences, Pune.
- Member National Health Service, UK, wesite, webMD

(The ource: CDC, New York and National Health Service, UK. The authorized content)

2009-08-10T10:41:00.000+05:30

hey.. dis is my new blog account that i hv just started.,Thanks to Alok.

I am really excited about this as I am having lot more things to share with you people. Ofcourse, at the same time i would like to be a part of never ending learning process.

Although this creature is interested in each and everything n each n every topics that exits on this Mother Earth, no maths n physics please, the vital contributions my side would be on Life sciences, literature, Trekking n Moutaineering n much more as far as something that strikes to my mind.

The Randomness of Life would be an interesting n facinating topic to u people as very less has been told n written about it. I shall try my best to be the wholehearted contributor of this.

The warlords n legends loved by that inuntiated GOD have already done so much work on the vary topics those I have mentioned above. I would act as their follower n believer and would share my little experience from the time i came to this world.

Looking forward for the generous support..!!

Tough Times Never Lasts..But Tough People Do..!!!

Shantanu. :)